Unfortunately, for some people, it is. But it shouldn’t be.
You might be one of the many who think dating is just some numbers game you and your friends are playing (trying to surpass each other with how many men/ladies you have dated in the last six months); and then again, maybe you’re not.
But here’s a cruel reality that most people intend to overlook: the more you think of it as a numbers game, the lesser your chance will be at finding the right one for you.
You see, because of the rise of the countless dating sites and apps, many people see it as an opportunity to seek out and try building relationships with others in a trial and error basis to see whether or not they have a chance to be with someone for life.
The negative effect it has brought forth is that, a lot of people developed a way of thinking that if things don’t work out, there will always be another one to catch out there. This kind of thinking is the very reason why people may tend to invest less efforts and emotions to their dates (or the person they have romantic relationship with at the moment).
So that when things don’t constantly work out’ for them, it will eventually develop a very unhealthy input to the emotional side of a person—which makes him/her a less believer of love in the long run.
So what should be the right approach in dating?
You have to understand that collect and select’ is not a very good method to turn into if you really want to actually have a real relationship and romance in your life. If you resort to dating (as a trial and error theory of finding the one), you will later realize that you have cost more time, efforts, and even tears for the wrong person.
The only result it will lead you to will be the vague proximity of really finding the right one for you. The worst case is, it may steer you away from the right one, too.
Because you are excited with the idea of dating, you may be getting excited for the wrong reasons. You may also lose the true objective of dating. Why are you even dating a person in the first place? To try and prove if you have a chance with that person at something, like love.
But if your judgments are clouded because of the influence of those dating sites and apps (like if it doesn’t work out, you still have a lot of persons to choose from—then try again!), you might end up reserving a lot for the next person instead REALLY trying what you can with that person with you right now.
Makes a lot of sense, right?
In a large place like London, it’s going to be even more difficult for you to catch the right one. So take you time.
Dating shouldn’t be just some numbers game, sometimes you need to take it slow in order to understand what it really means, and what it can really give you.